Wow, can't believe it is almost November. I was at the grocery store last night when I smelt a familiar smell. It was Christmas! Wow...this soon.
These past couple of months have been fun, exciting, exhausting and frustrating. But then again, not everything can be good at all times.
I got a temp job working at Fred Segal for the sale. Had so much fun....
But that ended.
I had an interview for a job in Pasadena. I really want it. I am throwing this out in the universe in hopes I get it.
And I partied it up with my friend Carolann ...woohoo...How times have changed. She can still kick it...me...not so much!
Comedy club with Barbara. And been trying to hit the gym and continue on needlepointing. I am in a bit of a slump right now that I hope to get out of tomorrow. So thought I would write real quick....Get a good night sleep and hopefully start fresh tomorrow.
I hate the feeling of uneasiness. Hate it. Not sure where to turn to next, but see a change in my near future!
I have to. I am miserable right now...
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Sunday, September 5, 2010
Only in Los Angeles
Can a girl skinny dip with a 22 year old recording studio guy on Sunday and Lunch with a 54 year old documentary filmmaker on Wednesday!
Still hitting the gym pretty hard. Need to continue to lose some of this obnoxious weight. Went to needlepointing. Loved it! Start Class this tuesday. Went to dinner club with devin. Loved that too! Was fun and met some nice people.
Thursday had gymboree with Dr. Care and bebe drake...Then dinner with b, Dr & D. before heading back to the 'hood.
I picked up my mail and it frustrated me so bad. I got sent to collections for unpaid bills which I did not know I had. And health insurance did not cover any of that $500.00 bill. WTH? So slap in the face. I got to sort out the car and don't know how I am going to swing that. I got so mad at my mom for getting into my business. I was calling to ask questions about a check my dad sent in and she started making comments and suggestions and told me how things should be. Believe me, I know how things should be but with this insurance world...it is not! I was criticized and given suggestions and thoughts that I did not need to hear at 5AM because I did not sleep at all that night because of stress. Then she opened up my bills and called me back to tell me the collection agency is calling home. I WAS IRATE! She said she would pay them. I told her I did not want her to b/c I could not trust her. She is filled with empty promises. And then she threw the "well you always say I am 35, I can handle things myself" I hung up on her. My family is so MESSED UP! in every way possible. I don't understand them. I think they are all crazy! they think I am difficult, moody and they have to tip toe around me. But seriously they are screwed up! But I am saving that story for a book!
Secrets, lies, arrests, deaths...crazy! crazy! crazy!
Friday was a fun skype date with my boys..yen and hen! Miss those boys so much and they cut off their hair!
This weekend has been about looking for work, needlepointing and gym and pool....I have not spoken to anyone but Joe and his son. Not in the mood to reach out. Will call people tomorrow. Carrie is awesome. She invited me to a pool party today, but I was just in a funk and did not want to drive that far on a holiday weekend. So for now...I might go see what is going on in the other room...
But before..ok I am on match.com..Not sure why. But met a pianist that teaches at ucla. I think he thought we were dating before we even went out!
I agreed to go out with him but asked for a photo. He said he would send one. And me being the investigator that I am, I found one online b4 he sent it so told him no need to send pic because it does not matter, I think it would be fun to meet up with him. Which I meant. I love the piano and he writes music, so thought it would be fun! Well I was on-line after Dinner with Devin on Wed and he started instant msg me. And it creeped me out. He kept saying " that is so sweet, do you really like me?"
"You said you really like me before we met, that is so sweet." UM..no I never said that. But he would not quit with this nonsense, so the next day I said you know what I am very busy the next few weeks and things have just come up. Which was so true. with collections, and car and bit stressed out and need to focus on finding work. within min. he replied back, well when can we meet up? I then replied, not sure like I said a lot is going on...then he said.. I will take your word for this and not read into it. I took my profile off match b/c just felt like it. Got sauced and changed my profile. When I changed my profile it automatically put it back on. Unaware of this, I get an email from piano man saying" i thought you were busy"...
Can we say, block and remove profile again! Within hours, I got an email on my gmail acct ...let me copy and paste...
Subject: Nice Attitude.
"Glad I didn't meet you. You showed your true colors and are a horrible liar. Blocking me on that site was the icing of the cake.....good riddance!
Get some manners...most people from NZ are very mannered...what happened to you???"
OK..lol...I decided not to meet you. I never lied, I have a lot on my mind and I am not from New Zealand. I am a bit concerned about this guys sanity at this point. Are you kidding me?
Then 15 min later I get this email from some made up address with athletic.dude in the email name but the guy had his initials as the contact so I immediately knew it was him...OK...whatever..here is the next email I got.
"How are you?
We met on that dating site. Are you busy this weekend or could you squeeze me in for a coffee?
George"
What piano man does not know is the email address i gave him is used only to enquiry about apts on craigslist and I don't give it to anyone. I only gave it to him b/c I did not want to give him my primary email addy b/c I did not want him to know my name. So, there is no way it could be anyone else but him. Then I checked the ip address and my thoughts were confirmed. OK I am a bit spooked out. Did not reply because I think I am dealing with someone with emotional issues. I contact match and filed a complaint. I am getting off this site. Only weird ones are finding me! I am done and for now I will just make out with 22 year olds late night in the pool!
Still hitting the gym pretty hard. Need to continue to lose some of this obnoxious weight. Went to needlepointing. Loved it! Start Class this tuesday. Went to dinner club with devin. Loved that too! Was fun and met some nice people.
Thursday had gymboree with Dr. Care and bebe drake...Then dinner with b, Dr & D. before heading back to the 'hood.
I picked up my mail and it frustrated me so bad. I got sent to collections for unpaid bills which I did not know I had. And health insurance did not cover any of that $500.00 bill. WTH? So slap in the face. I got to sort out the car and don't know how I am going to swing that. I got so mad at my mom for getting into my business. I was calling to ask questions about a check my dad sent in and she started making comments and suggestions and told me how things should be. Believe me, I know how things should be but with this insurance world...it is not! I was criticized and given suggestions and thoughts that I did not need to hear at 5AM because I did not sleep at all that night because of stress. Then she opened up my bills and called me back to tell me the collection agency is calling home. I WAS IRATE! She said she would pay them. I told her I did not want her to b/c I could not trust her. She is filled with empty promises. And then she threw the "well you always say I am 35, I can handle things myself" I hung up on her. My family is so MESSED UP! in every way possible. I don't understand them. I think they are all crazy! they think I am difficult, moody and they have to tip toe around me. But seriously they are screwed up! But I am saving that story for a book!
Secrets, lies, arrests, deaths...crazy! crazy! crazy!
Friday was a fun skype date with my boys..yen and hen! Miss those boys so much and they cut off their hair!
This weekend has been about looking for work, needlepointing and gym and pool....I have not spoken to anyone but Joe and his son. Not in the mood to reach out. Will call people tomorrow. Carrie is awesome. She invited me to a pool party today, but I was just in a funk and did not want to drive that far on a holiday weekend. So for now...I might go see what is going on in the other room...
But before..ok I am on match.com..Not sure why. But met a pianist that teaches at ucla. I think he thought we were dating before we even went out!
I agreed to go out with him but asked for a photo. He said he would send one. And me being the investigator that I am, I found one online b4 he sent it so told him no need to send pic because it does not matter, I think it would be fun to meet up with him. Which I meant. I love the piano and he writes music, so thought it would be fun! Well I was on-line after Dinner with Devin on Wed and he started instant msg me. And it creeped me out. He kept saying " that is so sweet, do you really like me?"
"You said you really like me before we met, that is so sweet." UM..no I never said that. But he would not quit with this nonsense, so the next day I said you know what I am very busy the next few weeks and things have just come up. Which was so true. with collections, and car and bit stressed out and need to focus on finding work. within min. he replied back, well when can we meet up? I then replied, not sure like I said a lot is going on...then he said.. I will take your word for this and not read into it. I took my profile off match b/c just felt like it. Got sauced and changed my profile. When I changed my profile it automatically put it back on. Unaware of this, I get an email from piano man saying" i thought you were busy"...
Can we say, block and remove profile again! Within hours, I got an email on my gmail acct ...let me copy and paste...
Subject: Nice Attitude.
"Glad I didn't meet you. You showed your true colors and are a horrible liar. Blocking me on that site was the icing of the cake.....good riddance!
Get some manners...most people from NZ are very mannered...what happened to you???"
OK..lol...I decided not to meet you. I never lied, I have a lot on my mind and I am not from New Zealand. I am a bit concerned about this guys sanity at this point. Are you kidding me?
Then 15 min later I get this email from some made up address with athletic.dude in the email name but the guy had his initials as the contact so I immediately knew it was him...OK...whatever..here is the next email I got.
"How are you?
We met on that dating site. Are you busy this weekend or could you squeeze me in for a coffee?
George"
What piano man does not know is the email address i gave him is used only to enquiry about apts on craigslist and I don't give it to anyone. I only gave it to him b/c I did not want to give him my primary email addy b/c I did not want him to know my name. So, there is no way it could be anyone else but him. Then I checked the ip address and my thoughts were confirmed. OK I am a bit spooked out. Did not reply because I think I am dealing with someone with emotional issues. I contact match and filed a complaint. I am getting off this site. Only weird ones are finding me! I am done and for now I will just make out with 22 year olds late night in the pool!
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
I have no idea
What I am going to do...but I got to do something. I told Joe I won't be here long. Carrie has been awesome and keeps telling me to come back over there. Barbara has offered up her place as well. But I think I am going to bounce around all over the place until I find a place of my own. I LOVE LA..have so much going on this week.
I joined equinox gym and love it! got to start working out harder...need to get my rear in shape!
Went out with Barbara sunday night...had a blast!
Carolanne invited me out Monday night...but was hungover.
errands and gym today
Lunch date and needlepoint shopping tomorrow then maybe meeting up with devin for din din...so sweet...
Friday Skype with my german boys! Miss them...then gym and pool and look for work.
Life is good...love it!
I joined equinox gym and love it! got to start working out harder...need to get my rear in shape!
Went out with Barbara sunday night...had a blast!
Carolanne invited me out Monday night...but was hungover.
errands and gym today
Lunch date and needlepoint shopping tomorrow then maybe meeting up with devin for din din...so sweet...
Friday Skype with my german boys! Miss them...then gym and pool and look for work.
Life is good...love it!
Monday, August 23, 2010
Chanel in Hawthorne!
Oh my goodness...I have finally made it to my final destination. I am on a month to month rental plan with my friend JOE! so fun and nice to see him. And he lives in Hawthorne. There are bars on my windows...so i feel safe. But I am in the hood. Met some nice neighbors tonight. Billy and adele. They were celebrating there 26th wedding anniversary.
I am so tired...so think I will try and get some rest tonight!
More about Lindsey in the hood to come...
I am so tired...so think I will try and get some rest tonight!
More about Lindsey in the hood to come...
Friday, August 20, 2010
California
I'm Here! Lovin it...hanging with Dr. Care and babe drake!
Headin to the hood 2MR where I will live and get situated!
Life works out well..Can't wait to see Joe!
Headin to the hood 2MR where I will live and get situated!
Life works out well..Can't wait to see Joe!
Monday, August 16, 2010
The Drunk Girl
Was not me on Friday Night~ woohoo!
It was actually fun being not the "drunk girl"
There was one girl dancing at the bar at sonnenalp.
She requested a john denver song and asked me if he was still alive.
I said no he died in a plane crash.
She said..oh no..not a plane crash in the rockies like he sings about.
I did not have an answer for her.
Her husband came in from bully ranch for the second time to tell her to come back to eat.
She left...for now....
Next girl...just married...on honeymoon...asked me to move in with her and husband to be nanny.
I said...let me go to the restroom and if you are still here when I get back...we will discuss...
As I walked out..her husband was dragging her out of bar.
Me...smiling..I was in control...well for at least that night!
It was actually fun being not the "drunk girl"
There was one girl dancing at the bar at sonnenalp.
She requested a john denver song and asked me if he was still alive.
I said no he died in a plane crash.
She said..oh no..not a plane crash in the rockies like he sings about.
I did not have an answer for her.
Her husband came in from bully ranch for the second time to tell her to come back to eat.
She left...for now....
Next girl...just married...on honeymoon...asked me to move in with her and husband to be nanny.
I said...let me go to the restroom and if you are still here when I get back...we will discuss...
As I walked out..her husband was dragging her out of bar.
Me...smiling..I was in control...well for at least that night!
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Changes
Each morning when you wake up it is a new fresh day. You get a clean slate and a chance to change habits you don't like.
Theme song: jamie foxx... BLAME IT ON THE ALCOHOL!
For instance, I was getting a bit sauced up lately. I am embarrassed and mortify to go into town now. I made a complete and total fool of myself. So as Maria Robinson said, “Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.”
I quit going out and started hitting the gym.
Theme song: Olivia Newton John LET"S GET PHYSICAL
I am having a blast there. I love people watching and discovered if I go in the afternoon there is some good eye candy there!
Afterwards, I hit the sauna, steam room and jacuzzi. Shower up and get home to eat a salad or weight watchers meal...
Today, I took a pilates equipment class. I am a bit scared of my pain tomorrow. I have not worked out my core in a while.
But am happy to say I have lost almost 8 lbs since I left Seattle a month ago. Woohoo.
I don't feel like I have changed anything nor do I feel like I have deprived myself. Maybe it was the stress from the whole antarctica thing or me taking notice of when I am actually full and to put down the fork. I am enjoying walks by Gore Creek - listening to my ipod and singing. Yes, I think some people think I am a bit silly...but does it really matter? Made more of fool in the bars...
Theme Song: Dolly Parton Nine to Five
So, as we all know Antarctica is not happening. I am a tiny bit disappointed but a HUGE BIT relieved. I was just getting too anxious. And I hate feeling like that. So this week I started sending out resumes. Sending them to Vail, Cali, TX, and pretty much any job I see. It is such a tough market right now and one that I do not want to be in. But I am unemployed right now and must really pound the pavement. Wish me luck!
Which leads me to I am getting bored in Vail and no feedback from resumes, so time to move on. But so torn.
Like Winston Churchill said, “There is nothing wrong with change, if it is in the right direction”
Theme song: Supertramp GOODBYE STRANGER
This is my life. I have such a huge fear of commitment. How do I know Cali will be good for me. I been there and failed.
The only plus is I have some amazing friends there that have offered up a place for me to stay. But they all have their families and children and it will get old. Their friendship is more important to me than a place to stay, but I can't afford to go blind to Cali with nothing lined up. I am lonely and bored here but have a place to stay. Or do I take a chance and try Cali again. It is not necessarily going to be the same because I have changed a lot since I left LA 5-6 years ago. I am such a different person. I know what i will put up with and act accordingly. Shockingly, it still hurts a bit but at least I have self respect for myself which brings me to ....
Theme song: Donna Summer LAST DANCE
I am 35 years old, do not need to go to the bar for a last dance! I have mortified myself and have not met any quality guys. One guy....New Jersey wealth...I kinda wish I was nicer..but it is done, he never called, move on!
So we got nature boy...I finally told him no more late night calls and I have not heard from him since.
Hurts my feelings because he is a nice guy, but did I want to marry him?....NO WAY....So move on...
And.. I MOVED ON TO MATCH.COM.....um...yea...wrong move...
Met one guy whom I had fun chatting with. English Gent...oh no...but funny. We would same time back and forth about the song afternoon delight and how it sounded like an ice cream marketing plan. It was fun...until he started emailing me to see if I wanted an afternoon delight. Don't know the guy real well, so do not think those jokes were appropriate. If they were jokes, I am not sure...He asked for number...I gave it once. He lost it and I take that as a sign. Would not give it to him again.
Then I met a guy who is so cute! He gave me his company website and his number and asked that I call. I *67 the number and called. OH MY GOSH...Guy was wasted! I mean wasted. In a matter of minutes, I knew he was divorced 2xs, he gets paid $150 an hour, he is opening up a new store, he moved here for a girl, he likes lots of activities, he easily is affected with seasonal affected disorder, how much his house cost, his recent DUI, and now he drinks only at home...obviously...guy was WASTED!
I tell the guy, I saw the picture of you with your nephew (who by the way looks about 3) and your nephew is adorable. He said oh...he is older now. Oh how old is he...He is in highschool - guy tells me. So his photo is at least 10-14 years old. I kind of wanted to ask if he had a more recent one, but guy was so drunk and babbling on about himself...I could barely get a word in.
I finally mention, I must go to bed and he says I made his night. Thank you for talking and let's meet tomorrow. He asks for my number. I tried to tell him I did not know it and he finally got my cell number out of me. I was bummed but did not know what to do and who knows maybe meeting for tea would be nice. But Drunk A$$ repeated the wrong number back to me.
I did not correct him.
Sent him an email a few hours later to cancel.
Guy did not get my email so continued to email me telling me he was at the covered bridge at 11 to meet me because he tried calling and my v/m was not set up. He wanted to reschedule. I said, I would call tomorrow. And have not heard from him since.
So..what was I thinking...I don't know....so back to plan a. Continue with scrapbooking, reading daily devotionals and working my fat rear off...until next time...good night!
I am very lonely here and ready to move on. But FEARFUL of the unknown. so a few more quotes
“For everything you have missed, you have gained something else, and for everything you gain, you lose something else.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson quotes (American Poet, Lecturer and Essayist, 1803-1882)
“The doors we open and close each day decide the lives we live.”
Flora Whittemore quotes
“Sometimes it's the smallest decisions that can change your life forever.”
Keri Russell quotes
Roseanne Cash “The key to change... is to let go of fear.”
Theme song: jamie foxx... BLAME IT ON THE ALCOHOL!
For instance, I was getting a bit sauced up lately. I am embarrassed and mortify to go into town now. I made a complete and total fool of myself. So as Maria Robinson said, “Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.”
I quit going out and started hitting the gym.
Theme song: Olivia Newton John LET"S GET PHYSICAL
I am having a blast there. I love people watching and discovered if I go in the afternoon there is some good eye candy there!
Afterwards, I hit the sauna, steam room and jacuzzi. Shower up and get home to eat a salad or weight watchers meal...
Today, I took a pilates equipment class. I am a bit scared of my pain tomorrow. I have not worked out my core in a while.
But am happy to say I have lost almost 8 lbs since I left Seattle a month ago. Woohoo.
I don't feel like I have changed anything nor do I feel like I have deprived myself. Maybe it was the stress from the whole antarctica thing or me taking notice of when I am actually full and to put down the fork. I am enjoying walks by Gore Creek - listening to my ipod and singing. Yes, I think some people think I am a bit silly...but does it really matter? Made more of fool in the bars...
Theme Song: Dolly Parton Nine to Five
So, as we all know Antarctica is not happening. I am a tiny bit disappointed but a HUGE BIT relieved. I was just getting too anxious. And I hate feeling like that. So this week I started sending out resumes. Sending them to Vail, Cali, TX, and pretty much any job I see. It is such a tough market right now and one that I do not want to be in. But I am unemployed right now and must really pound the pavement. Wish me luck!
Which leads me to I am getting bored in Vail and no feedback from resumes, so time to move on. But so torn.
Like Winston Churchill said, “There is nothing wrong with change, if it is in the right direction”
Theme song: Supertramp GOODBYE STRANGER
This is my life. I have such a huge fear of commitment. How do I know Cali will be good for me. I been there and failed.
The only plus is I have some amazing friends there that have offered up a place for me to stay. But they all have their families and children and it will get old. Their friendship is more important to me than a place to stay, but I can't afford to go blind to Cali with nothing lined up. I am lonely and bored here but have a place to stay. Or do I take a chance and try Cali again. It is not necessarily going to be the same because I have changed a lot since I left LA 5-6 years ago. I am such a different person. I know what i will put up with and act accordingly. Shockingly, it still hurts a bit but at least I have self respect for myself which brings me to ....
Theme song: Donna Summer LAST DANCE
I am 35 years old, do not need to go to the bar for a last dance! I have mortified myself and have not met any quality guys. One guy....New Jersey wealth...I kinda wish I was nicer..but it is done, he never called, move on!
So we got nature boy...I finally told him no more late night calls and I have not heard from him since.
Hurts my feelings because he is a nice guy, but did I want to marry him?....NO WAY....So move on...
And.. I MOVED ON TO MATCH.COM.....um...yea...wrong move...
Met one guy whom I had fun chatting with. English Gent...oh no...but funny. We would same time back and forth about the song afternoon delight and how it sounded like an ice cream marketing plan. It was fun...until he started emailing me to see if I wanted an afternoon delight. Don't know the guy real well, so do not think those jokes were appropriate. If they were jokes, I am not sure...He asked for number...I gave it once. He lost it and I take that as a sign. Would not give it to him again.
Then I met a guy who is so cute! He gave me his company website and his number and asked that I call. I *67 the number and called. OH MY GOSH...Guy was wasted! I mean wasted. In a matter of minutes, I knew he was divorced 2xs, he gets paid $150 an hour, he is opening up a new store, he moved here for a girl, he likes lots of activities, he easily is affected with seasonal affected disorder, how much his house cost, his recent DUI, and now he drinks only at home...obviously...guy was WASTED!
I tell the guy, I saw the picture of you with your nephew (who by the way looks about 3) and your nephew is adorable. He said oh...he is older now. Oh how old is he...He is in highschool - guy tells me. So his photo is at least 10-14 years old. I kind of wanted to ask if he had a more recent one, but guy was so drunk and babbling on about himself...I could barely get a word in.
I finally mention, I must go to bed and he says I made his night. Thank you for talking and let's meet tomorrow. He asks for my number. I tried to tell him I did not know it and he finally got my cell number out of me. I was bummed but did not know what to do and who knows maybe meeting for tea would be nice. But Drunk A$$ repeated the wrong number back to me.
I did not correct him.
Sent him an email a few hours later to cancel.
Guy did not get my email so continued to email me telling me he was at the covered bridge at 11 to meet me because he tried calling and my v/m was not set up. He wanted to reschedule. I said, I would call tomorrow. And have not heard from him since.
So..what was I thinking...I don't know....so back to plan a. Continue with scrapbooking, reading daily devotionals and working my fat rear off...until next time...good night!
I am very lonely here and ready to move on. But FEARFUL of the unknown. so a few more quotes
“For everything you have missed, you have gained something else, and for everything you gain, you lose something else.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson quotes (American Poet, Lecturer and Essayist, 1803-1882)
“The doors we open and close each day decide the lives we live.”
Flora Whittemore quotes
“Sometimes it's the smallest decisions that can change your life forever.”
Keri Russell quotes
Roseanne Cash “The key to change... is to let go of fear.”
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
The Jersey Shore!
Makes me feel a whole lot better about my drunken nights out!
Still in hiding though. For now it is Gym, steam, jacuzzi!
Bed early, Rise Early, get resumes out, and finish my scrapbook!
Still in hiding though. For now it is Gym, steam, jacuzzi!
Bed early, Rise Early, get resumes out, and finish my scrapbook!
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
NO! NO! I don't know! I don't know!
No - I am not going to Antarctica! Change of Heart! Maybe next year?
No - Nature boy! You cannot call me at 1AM to see if I want you to stop by! I do not feel bad that you had to walk home 4 miles. Call a cab. There is no need to call again at 3:45AM to see if I have a change of heart. I don't! Not my problem. My feelings were really hurt that you never invited me out with your friends or just you for a drink, walk or bike ride.
I don't know! When I am leaving Vail
I don't know! What I am doing
But I am not real worried about it right now. I have got my computer and a good resume and will start sending it out.
Plus I have a great group of friends. One woohoo'd when I told her I was not going to antarctica and told me to come stay with her. Just so sweet! Offered up her pool and a bit of R n R!
So for now..laundry time...then maybe dinner time..then maybe drinks...lots and lots of drinks! who knows!
No - Nature boy! You cannot call me at 1AM to see if I want you to stop by! I do not feel bad that you had to walk home 4 miles. Call a cab. There is no need to call again at 3:45AM to see if I have a change of heart. I don't! Not my problem. My feelings were really hurt that you never invited me out with your friends or just you for a drink, walk or bike ride.
I don't know! When I am leaving Vail
I don't know! What I am doing
But I am not real worried about it right now. I have got my computer and a good resume and will start sending it out.
Plus I have a great group of friends. One woohoo'd when I told her I was not going to antarctica and told me to come stay with her. Just so sweet! Offered up her pool and a bit of R n R!
So for now..laundry time...then maybe dinner time..then maybe drinks...lots and lots of drinks! who knows!
Monday, August 2, 2010
The Dungeon, Rain & Nature Boy
The place I stayed in was very nice. Comfy bed and black out curtains made it for a good night sleep! No Magpie nest there! I am in the basement...so nothing there. Heavenly! The tick of the darn clock! URGH! Thank goodness for earplugs. I have never been more annoyed with a clock than that one. But now am a firm believer of ear plugs!
Thunderstorms and Rain made it easy to stay in Jammies all day yesterday! And lounge in bed. Had a good talk with my mom and my friend mariah and guess what!
Nature boy texted me. I have told him about txt msg me. But thought I could use some company. So very frustrated with all of life right now. So he mentioned going for a beer. By the time I reached him - he changed it to meeting up. So we watched the invention of lying. Was a cute funny movie. Then we just talked. Nice, Nice Guy...But clueless! so clueless.
Oh well...
Thunderstorms and Rain made it easy to stay in Jammies all day yesterday! And lounge in bed. Had a good talk with my mom and my friend mariah and guess what!
Nature boy texted me. I have told him about txt msg me. But thought I could use some company. So very frustrated with all of life right now. So he mentioned going for a beer. By the time I reached him - he changed it to meeting up. So we watched the invention of lying. Was a cute funny movie. Then we just talked. Nice, Nice Guy...But clueless! so clueless.
Oh well...
Saturday, July 31, 2010
Nature Boy? Don't come knockin at 3am then ignore my calls...
OK...so go back to nature boy. The great outdoorsman! Anyway...I will admit...after our walk monday night he came back to my place. Nothing at all happened! I made sure of that. I was exhausted from the night before. And not real sure how I feel about nature boy. But he did spend the night. We talked movies, life, politics. etc...
At about 9AM These darn birds started chirping! Woke me up.
Nature boy: " there must be a magpie nest near"
Me "what is a magpie"
NB " they are birds"
Me "Well I wish i had a gun right about now, I would shoot them! they are driving me crazy!"
NB shocked look on face looks at me and is probably thinking Alrighty!
Well I told him he needs to go b/c I had some things I needed to do. That is when he insisted on taking a shower.
Who does that? I know I am out of the loop, but ya get out as quick as possible in the morn...
So he showers and I walk him down. And tell him I will be around until Wed/ Thurs if he wants to hang out let me know.
At about 10pm Mon I get a text asking me out for Wed.. I reply back sure...give me a call.
I go to sleep...so excited for a sober night in bed. ALoNE!
Wake up the next day to 2 text and a missed call between 2:45am- 3:15am.
short of it...saying he is going to stop by to see if i am up on first text
around 3 am missed call from nature boy
3:15 text...sorry about the ring..was seeing if you were up.
OK what i don't understand is I have known this guy for 3 days. Why does he think he can just show up at 3am? NOTHING HAS HAPPENED! 2nd the night before I mentioned that i have a hard time sleeping. Why would he try and wake me in the middle of the night?
One thing nature boy does not know is that the last person to just show up at my place ended up in Jail!
I was irate. I do not like unannounced visitors. Especially at 3AM and it kind of creeps me out that someone would lurk around my window. That is just weird.
So day continues to get worst. I then find out that I need to go back to Denver on Thursday. I have no place to stay b/c uncle fam is kicking me out of my mom's place. and I need to stay in CO.
So what is a girl to do. But go to the bar. and drink and eat and drink and eat. at about 6:30 I realize it is time to go home. I am wasted! i woddle out of the place and go home. I call Nature boy...but straight to v/m...did not want to leave msg. b/c did not know what i wanted to say. Am i mad b/c he just showed up? am i mad that he asked how much the condo cost? but I really enjoyed talking to him. So try 2 more times both going directly to v/m. Left a msg. I think????? And then laid down. Woke up at 8:15. Wow can't believe I slept through the night...upon further inspection, I realize it is the still the same night.
I get dressed and go see if the hot dog stand is opened. It is not. So back to condo where I call carrie and have a good cry.
Not about the hot dog...but just frustrated!
I did not sleep that night. Mad upset angry and hurt!
I got up and cleaned the condo and left...
So thursday comes and I head to Denver. Horrible Horrible day! 2nd in a row. I was so frustrated and wanted to hang out with someone so call Nature Boy. Went to v/m and he still did not call me back? WTH? You don't just show up at someone's place at 3am and send texts and call and then ignore me when I try to reach you again? Weird! I was so tired when I got home I went straight to sleep...so easily.
Slept till about noon today. Then laid in bed and watched "You're cut off" At around 4 I had to get up and get out. Off to Larksburger. I kept reading about it in the paper...So thought I would venture out.
Next stop Vail Athletic Club for a 40 min workout while watching Jersey Shore...
Now it is time for bed. Time for bed!
At about 9AM These darn birds started chirping! Woke me up.
Nature boy: " there must be a magpie nest near"
Me "what is a magpie"
NB " they are birds"
Me "Well I wish i had a gun right about now, I would shoot them! they are driving me crazy!"
NB shocked look on face looks at me and is probably thinking Alrighty!
Well I told him he needs to go b/c I had some things I needed to do. That is when he insisted on taking a shower.
Who does that? I know I am out of the loop, but ya get out as quick as possible in the morn...
So he showers and I walk him down. And tell him I will be around until Wed/ Thurs if he wants to hang out let me know.
At about 10pm Mon I get a text asking me out for Wed.. I reply back sure...give me a call.
I go to sleep...so excited for a sober night in bed. ALoNE!
Wake up the next day to 2 text and a missed call between 2:45am- 3:15am.
short of it...saying he is going to stop by to see if i am up on first text
around 3 am missed call from nature boy
3:15 text...sorry about the ring..was seeing if you were up.
OK what i don't understand is I have known this guy for 3 days. Why does he think he can just show up at 3am? NOTHING HAS HAPPENED! 2nd the night before I mentioned that i have a hard time sleeping. Why would he try and wake me in the middle of the night?
One thing nature boy does not know is that the last person to just show up at my place ended up in Jail!
I was irate. I do not like unannounced visitors. Especially at 3AM and it kind of creeps me out that someone would lurk around my window. That is just weird.
So day continues to get worst. I then find out that I need to go back to Denver on Thursday. I have no place to stay b/c uncle fam is kicking me out of my mom's place. and I need to stay in CO.
So what is a girl to do. But go to the bar. and drink and eat and drink and eat. at about 6:30 I realize it is time to go home. I am wasted! i woddle out of the place and go home. I call Nature boy...but straight to v/m...did not want to leave msg. b/c did not know what i wanted to say. Am i mad b/c he just showed up? am i mad that he asked how much the condo cost? but I really enjoyed talking to him. So try 2 more times both going directly to v/m. Left a msg. I think????? And then laid down. Woke up at 8:15. Wow can't believe I slept through the night...upon further inspection, I realize it is the still the same night.
I get dressed and go see if the hot dog stand is opened. It is not. So back to condo where I call carrie and have a good cry.
Not about the hot dog...but just frustrated!
I did not sleep that night. Mad upset angry and hurt!
I got up and cleaned the condo and left...
So thursday comes and I head to Denver. Horrible Horrible day! 2nd in a row. I was so frustrated and wanted to hang out with someone so call Nature Boy. Went to v/m and he still did not call me back? WTH? You don't just show up at someone's place at 3am and send texts and call and then ignore me when I try to reach you again? Weird! I was so tired when I got home I went straight to sleep...so easily.
Slept till about noon today. Then laid in bed and watched "You're cut off" At around 4 I had to get up and get out. Off to Larksburger. I kept reading about it in the paper...So thought I would venture out.
Next stop Vail Athletic Club for a 40 min workout while watching Jersey Shore...
Now it is time for bed. Time for bed!
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
packing up and moving on...
Well to the other side of the village. My family is so screwed up! I am staying at my mom & aunt's condo in Vail. But my uncle asked an aunt if he could use it. She had no idea i was out here and saw no problem so said yes. After she found out she called and apologized profusely which was so not necessary. But the weird thing is. My uncle has a 2 bedroom condo, my cousin has a 1 bedroom condo and my mom & aunts is 2 bedroom. I am getting shifted out of here to rent a place when they have 3 bedrooms that sleep at least 7. Here is the crazy thing....only 6 people are coming. WTF????
So I am booted out.
I did not sleep at all last night. HAD A HUGE CRY! my sweet friend carrie was a tremendous help. I have been blessed with awesome friends! It is nice and sunny...I am inside and sleepy!
So I am booted out.
I did not sleep at all last night. HAD A HUGE CRY! my sweet friend carrie was a tremendous help. I have been blessed with awesome friends! It is nice and sunny...I am inside and sleepy!
Monday, July 26, 2010
Sitting on a rock with my feet in the creek.
What a great day! Took a walk around the village last night with a guy I met. He is very educated in all outdoors. We talked about life and what it means to live. Listened to the aspen leaves rustle..(whatever they are). He pointed out the big dipper and some planet in the sky. We looked at the moon. Watched a fox go running past us with his dinner. And just enjoyed the peace that came with the night.
Today, I have spent the morning with my feet in Gore Creek and reading. Bravo came out to play on the lawn. Listened to some great music. And just tried to be in the moment. Watched the kids in the creek. Decided to get lunch at about 1:30. Couldn't decide a place so finally ended up at La Cantina. Good and Cheap! On my way to the restaurant, I stopped at the fountain noone was in there...so I put my feet in! And smiled.
Today, I have spent the morning with my feet in Gore Creek and reading. Bravo came out to play on the lawn. Listened to some great music. And just tried to be in the moment. Watched the kids in the creek. Decided to get lunch at about 1:30. Couldn't decide a place so finally ended up at La Cantina. Good and Cheap! On my way to the restaurant, I stopped at the fountain noone was in there...so I put my feet in! And smiled.
Saturday, July 24, 2010
FAME
I have a guilty pleasure of watching reality shows. All of the Real Housewives, Tori & Dean, a few on MTV, The Bachelor, and many many more. I also have a lot of time on my hands so I read gossip sites, play on facebook and follow people on twitter. I recently noticed some of the reality stars craving more and more. Some stars are begging the twitterverse for their own shows, hinting for interviews and attention from talk show hosts and magazines. And I think, how pathetic. It is one thing to be given something and embracing it and another to stoop to a level of begging. Don't get me wrong, I do believe you have to go after what you want but at what point does it get pathetic?
As a little girl, all I wanted was to go to Hollywood and be famous. I was going to be an actress. At 25, I moved to LA. It took a few years, but I finally knew the right door people, got into the right bars, lunched at the right restaurants. At one point, my friends and I were on the same club circuit as Hef and his mates. I was invited to private parties, hooked up with a well known actor, a guitar player from a canadian band, a director of a movie that did not do too well, and dated a photographer. I was in the scene. I was skinny, barely eating and always with a drink and a prescription of Clonazepam. I had my dream car a 330BMW convertible. I loved the attention I got from the boys and the men. I met someone every night I went out. One fourth of July, I was out with a group of people. We crashed 2 parties. One was Shane Blacks big 4th another was some innocent guy in Malibu just trying to have his buddies over. Looking back, I can't believe I stooped to that. But every last bit was great fun!
I would not trade those years for anything else. Did I get what I wanted? No because I was pathetic for wanting something that I could not name.
Now I write this blog, just for me. Every once in a while I will check the map and noone has been to my blog. No-one knows I started writing here again. And not going to tell anyone. I realized I can look at that map all the time and see how many visitors I have, but why does that matter? Am I writing this for other people? No, this is for me. This is my journal. Kind of like a secret treasure. I have a friend that has asked for the blog address. I have not given it to her yet. I will if she asks again but as I am embracing my life and proud of all the opportunities and experiences I have had - I also realize my life is no greater than anyone else. Why would someone care about my life? Why would I ask for attention? I have been blessed with some wonderful friends and I know they care but I would never subject them to my random thoughts. I would prefer to talk to them on the phone or in person and they all know that. I have lived a different life from the typical 30something from atlanta. I have had many unique experiences- some are just flat out unbelievable and a bit on the nutty side but this is my life. I wake up each day with nothing to worry about except myself.
I am single and rarely wonder what it would be like to be married and settled down. I think I passed that about 2 years ago and accepted that the odds of me getting married are quite low at this point. . A friend asked me the other day if I was going to marry someone that liked to travel like I do or if I was going to marry someone to settle me down. Honestly, I felt flattered that she would think someone would marry me. Part of me would like the marriage but the other part of me wonders if I could commit? I have a problem signing a lease on an apartment for over a year! A couple of weeks ago, I was talking to my friend from Seattle area. We were going through our guys that we might of maybe should of held on to. And I named one or two that I should of given a chance. My grandmother likes to remind me of them often. But at the end of the day - no. no. no. It would not of worked. Unfortunately, because they have both been married and had kids. But that is not what I want. I do not want a marriage. I want an honest and loving relationship and if it turns into marriage then so be. I do not want my own kids. I have nieces and nephews that I adore and many many children in my life to love. If I have my own kids then they will be loved. But I am not going to use marriage and children to fill a void. I don't know what this void is that I have. I am searching myself and enjoying the motions.
In this journey, I have realized I have wanted many things and I have gotten most of those things. Am I better off today? maybe, maybe not? I do know that the words I write here are for me. And me only. I am not writing this for people. I am not looking for the right words or perfect saying to be quoted. I don't care if I never get a hit on the map. Because at the end of the day, it is about me. It has to be! Because if I don't have the love in me noone will ever receive true love from me. OK to be honest I probably would do a little dance if I saw someone stumbled upon my page...but i am not crushed that it is my dirty little secret right now.
Which leads me back to the beginning of this rambling. Are people just not content in their own lives that they have to scream "look here...look at me?" Reality stars...love to watch them but come on!
As a little girl, all I wanted was to go to Hollywood and be famous. I was going to be an actress. At 25, I moved to LA. It took a few years, but I finally knew the right door people, got into the right bars, lunched at the right restaurants. At one point, my friends and I were on the same club circuit as Hef and his mates. I was invited to private parties, hooked up with a well known actor, a guitar player from a canadian band, a director of a movie that did not do too well, and dated a photographer. I was in the scene. I was skinny, barely eating and always with a drink and a prescription of Clonazepam. I had my dream car a 330BMW convertible. I loved the attention I got from the boys and the men. I met someone every night I went out. One fourth of July, I was out with a group of people. We crashed 2 parties. One was Shane Blacks big 4th another was some innocent guy in Malibu just trying to have his buddies over. Looking back, I can't believe I stooped to that. But every last bit was great fun!
I would not trade those years for anything else. Did I get what I wanted? No because I was pathetic for wanting something that I could not name.
Now I write this blog, just for me. Every once in a while I will check the map and noone has been to my blog. No-one knows I started writing here again. And not going to tell anyone. I realized I can look at that map all the time and see how many visitors I have, but why does that matter? Am I writing this for other people? No, this is for me. This is my journal. Kind of like a secret treasure. I have a friend that has asked for the blog address. I have not given it to her yet. I will if she asks again but as I am embracing my life and proud of all the opportunities and experiences I have had - I also realize my life is no greater than anyone else. Why would someone care about my life? Why would I ask for attention? I have been blessed with some wonderful friends and I know they care but I would never subject them to my random thoughts. I would prefer to talk to them on the phone or in person and they all know that. I have lived a different life from the typical 30something from atlanta. I have had many unique experiences- some are just flat out unbelievable and a bit on the nutty side but this is my life. I wake up each day with nothing to worry about except myself.
I am single and rarely wonder what it would be like to be married and settled down. I think I passed that about 2 years ago and accepted that the odds of me getting married are quite low at this point. . A friend asked me the other day if I was going to marry someone that liked to travel like I do or if I was going to marry someone to settle me down. Honestly, I felt flattered that she would think someone would marry me. Part of me would like the marriage but the other part of me wonders if I could commit? I have a problem signing a lease on an apartment for over a year! A couple of weeks ago, I was talking to my friend from Seattle area. We were going through our guys that we might of maybe should of held on to. And I named one or two that I should of given a chance. My grandmother likes to remind me of them often. But at the end of the day - no. no. no. It would not of worked. Unfortunately, because they have both been married and had kids. But that is not what I want. I do not want a marriage. I want an honest and loving relationship and if it turns into marriage then so be. I do not want my own kids. I have nieces and nephews that I adore and many many children in my life to love. If I have my own kids then they will be loved. But I am not going to use marriage and children to fill a void. I don't know what this void is that I have. I am searching myself and enjoying the motions.
In this journey, I have realized I have wanted many things and I have gotten most of those things. Am I better off today? maybe, maybe not? I do know that the words I write here are for me. And me only. I am not writing this for people. I am not looking for the right words or perfect saying to be quoted. I don't care if I never get a hit on the map. Because at the end of the day, it is about me. It has to be! Because if I don't have the love in me noone will ever receive true love from me. OK to be honest I probably would do a little dance if I saw someone stumbled upon my page...but i am not crushed that it is my dirty little secret right now.
Which leads me back to the beginning of this rambling. Are people just not content in their own lives that they have to scream "look here...look at me?" Reality stars...love to watch them but come on!
Friday, July 23, 2010
Stop & Breathe!
Yesterday, I went to Denver for a day full of appointments.
First stop, Dentist for a cleaning. I need new bridges or implants.
But so do not want to spend $10,000- $20,000 on teeth at the moment.
I am living in a car and bumming around this Country. But it feels good to have nice and clean teeth!
Next stop, The bookstore.
My dear friend was going to send me the book "the power of now" but I told her I would pick it up when in Denver. I was talking with her about looking back on my life and seeing how I was not nice to some people.
And I really am upset about that. I never want a stranger to feel unwelcome or uneasy in my presence. Why would I do that to someone? Would I want someone to do that to me?
OK we are going back to the guy....
I think I am trying to find reasons to contact him, even though he did not give me his details.
The internet provides way too much information these days. Just by his first name and knowing the day he
played lacrosse, I found out his last name. It was kind of easy since his name is not Matt, Bryan or
any other common name. But why would I do that? That is just weird! Part of me thinks that he might
be flattered that I took the time to find him. And the other part thinks STALKER and reminds me of my ex boyfriend. There was nothing neat or romantic about him showing up at my parents house in Atlanta delirious. Needing to talk? I still see his face at the door and remember the tightness in my chest. Looking into his eyes, I felt like I was looking deep inside of him and there was nothing there and he was breathing so heavy. I was scared. Why would he drive from Michigan to Atlanta to "talk?". I gave him a few seconds to leave or I was going to call the police.. it really freaked me out!
Not sure what we needed to talk about because in about a week...I was heading to New Zealand....for a year.
So in my heart I am still wanting to hear from Lacrosse guy...but in my head I don't know why?
While picking up the Tolle Book, I ran across a book called women, food and God. And headed to the
foodcourt for the most expensive mall lunch ever! I feasted on a Gyro & Fries and 2 LARGE Diet cokes
while reading Women food & God. Which basically told the reader to only eat when they are
hungry. I thought about that as I ate and no, I was not hungry. I am eating because it is lunch time and I
have nothing else to do. I don't know if I have ever been hungry? I think I eat constantly...which is why I
am constantly a member of weight watchers.
Lunch over, books picked up, now it is time to head to the office so I can drop off the rest of my paperwork.
That was a quick stop. Next, I drop by the doctor's office to get my TB shot read and that was quick. Next stop.
OH PICKLES! One I am so dreading.
I input the address in my GPS and start the 30 minute drive. I realize I will be an hour early. But I have nothing left on
my list to do. As I exit the highway, I spot a car wash. Umm...good way to kill some time. I have so many dead bugs on
my car from my driving over 5000 miles in a month. I order up an exterior clean because the interior is just a mess with sweat shirts, movies, clothes, shoes, food, etc.
I wait 10 minutes then hop in my sparkling clean car and notice all the chips in the windshield. OH Pickles again!
About a mile down the road, I stop into a service station. I see that there is a full service island and opt to pay the additional $1.00 a gallon to get my oil, tires, and fluids checked. I was going to take it into Lexus but that would of cost over $100.00 plus they wanted to do a HUGE CHECK UP on the car...so I cancelled my appointment. $50.00 later, fueled up, tires filled and fluid topped off, I continue on this dreadful journey to my last location.
The lady from GPS guided me directly to the spot. I pulled into the parking lot at the hospital and locked the car doors and started walking towards the entrance. The part of the hospital I was entering was also the cancer wing. I caught an elevator with a lady that had a scarf wrapped around her head where her hair should be. She appeared to be my age. As we entered the elevator, I noticed a gentleman in his 40s or 50s with a cooler of something medical attached to him and I could smell the medicine coming out of his cooler. The lady and man exchanged some words which included some jokes about cocktails of choice to chill in his cooler. I was the outsider because I had no idea what they were discussing. But they were smiling and friendly and laughing and living with Cancer. I was PETRIFIED with my upcoming appointment and felt like a fool. What is wrong with me. As far as I know I am perfectly healthy. I have seen Death way to close. I have experienced the worst. OK. Not very gracefully, but I have. And I just could not handle what I was walking into.
Rose Breast Center was the door I walked into. I gave my name and was sent to a lady to check me in. Within 1 minute of sitting down in the chair, I lost it! LOST IT! She looked at me and said lets go outside. I make it to the hallway when my face is getting numb and I cannot breathe. Tears falling down my face and I grabbed on to the wall and slide down. All in my skirt with a slit up to there and gucci wedges. At least I looked cute in distress.
I heard one lady say, "do you need a glass of water?" and then another lady walking by and stopping to see what was going on. The next thing I remember is one lady is back with juice and water and another with a chair for me to sit in and another lady is wiping me down with wet towels. I finally catch my breathe and start breathing. What is up with all of this hyperventilating? NEVER BEFORE HAS IT BEEN THIS BAD. When my nephew passed away, it was bad. But not to the point where I almost passed out. I gain a smidget of my composure and return inside to continue checking in. Working myself all up again but not as bad.
I was sent to the waiting area to wait for my first Mammogram.
I had just started reading how Marisa Tomei looks so good in the recent Shape magazine when I get called back. I was so awkward walking back. I could not get my act together and did not want to go.
I was put in the changing room and told to put on the robe and then head over to exam room #1.
Shaking in my wedges, I walk across the hall to meet the mammogram lady.
Thinking I should take off these wedges right about now because I was sure I was going to fall...She said not to in case there were staples on the floor. That was not a concern of mine at all at this point. But OK I will listen to her.
Step up to the machine, she plops my right Double D in there and moves the machine around. Steps back, tells me to take a deep breath. I inhale hold for a few seconds then was told to exhale and then was told first slide done. Are you kidding me? At that point, I started laughing and asked, "is that it?" Yes...that was it.
What in the world was I thinking? Why did I get so upset and worked up for the unknown. It was just fine. Not uncomfortable. Just a little awkward with a lady touching your boob. But it was just about the same as getting sized for a bra. NOTHING! AT this point, I am embarrassed. Whoever said mammograms were bad? That is a joke. I can handle one of these any day over a shot or blood drawn. It was so nothing! Like going to get fitted for a bra. Nothing! 3 more slides and I am blushing for acting like a fool.
After I got dressed, I walked through the waiting room and stopped by to tell the sweet lady that was wiping me down with towels during unnecessary panic attack that it was not bad at all. She offered to cut off my hospital band and I let her. There was a secret desire deep inside for me to wear it. I wanted a souvenir of my day. But off it went and into the trash. We had a bit of a laugh and I jumped in the car and headed back to Vail.
Ride home I stopped in Dillon for a 12 pack. I think I deserve a drink right about now and not sure if I want to go to red lion after meeting lacrosse boy. Did I mention, I was drunk that night?
Home, scrapbook, beer, and bed.
Today was up at 3:30AM! WTH? laid around until about 6 when I got up to go to the village to get a paper. Me in my jammies and clogs with a coat over me. Was so nice and peaceful this morning. No-one out but the beer delivery guy. Not even the Vail Daily was out yet. I grabbed another paper and walked back to the condo. I laid in bed and researched home remedies for hyperventilating and then read the paper while listening to I LOVE LUCY on the TV. I finally fell back to sleep until 10AM.
When I woke, I checked e-mail and saw that all of my doctor reports have been received by Medical except my mammogram and Pap cytology.
So off I went to send the request to my ATL ob-gyn to forward pap results to Medical. (those don't go real well either, but that is such a thing of the past...so May)
I stopped by City Market, then off to lunch. Feeling a bit hung-over today. Maybe had 1 or 2 too many? maybe?
I can't believe it, looks like I am going to Antarctica. If they don't stop me with all of my panic attacks I have been having at the Docs.
After lunch, I wandered through Vail and found a perfect spot in the grass for me to lie. I listened to the water flow by. Watched the children play in the creek. Watched the new parents in awe over their little ones and was just in the "NOW". I picked up my book and read. Looking up when I heard laughter. It did not matter that I was alone and all by myself. I was there, there until the clouds took over the sky.
Nap time! Wake up! Then Walk! My thoughts were getting to me during my walk. I tried to run but realized I could not run from the past and into the dreams of the future. I am reliving the past and thinking about the future. I know I can't run from something and then directly into something that I desire but being caught between the past and the future is no way to live. For a moment, I lose myself in my i-pod. sing and dance and as my arms flail out, I almost knock a lady down trying to bike past me. A smile comes across my face. Not that I almost knocked the lady down, but I was in the moment.
First stop, Dentist for a cleaning. I need new bridges or implants.
But so do not want to spend $10,000- $20,000 on teeth at the moment.
I am living in a car and bumming around this Country. But it feels good to have nice and clean teeth!
Next stop, The bookstore.
My dear friend was going to send me the book "the power of now" but I told her I would pick it up when in Denver. I was talking with her about looking back on my life and seeing how I was not nice to some people.
And I really am upset about that. I never want a stranger to feel unwelcome or uneasy in my presence. Why would I do that to someone? Would I want someone to do that to me?
OK we are going back to the guy....
I think I am trying to find reasons to contact him, even though he did not give me his details.
The internet provides way too much information these days. Just by his first name and knowing the day he
played lacrosse, I found out his last name. It was kind of easy since his name is not Matt, Bryan or
any other common name. But why would I do that? That is just weird! Part of me thinks that he might
be flattered that I took the time to find him. And the other part thinks STALKER and reminds me of my ex boyfriend. There was nothing neat or romantic about him showing up at my parents house in Atlanta delirious. Needing to talk? I still see his face at the door and remember the tightness in my chest. Looking into his eyes, I felt like I was looking deep inside of him and there was nothing there and he was breathing so heavy. I was scared. Why would he drive from Michigan to Atlanta to "talk?". I gave him a few seconds to leave or I was going to call the police.. it really freaked me out!
Not sure what we needed to talk about because in about a week...I was heading to New Zealand....for a year.
So in my heart I am still wanting to hear from Lacrosse guy...but in my head I don't know why?
While picking up the Tolle Book, I ran across a book called women, food and God. And headed to the
foodcourt for the most expensive mall lunch ever! I feasted on a Gyro & Fries and 2 LARGE Diet cokes
while reading Women food & God. Which basically told the reader to only eat when they are
hungry. I thought about that as I ate and no, I was not hungry. I am eating because it is lunch time and I
have nothing else to do. I don't know if I have ever been hungry? I think I eat constantly...which is why I
am constantly a member of weight watchers.
Lunch over, books picked up, now it is time to head to the office so I can drop off the rest of my paperwork.
That was a quick stop. Next, I drop by the doctor's office to get my TB shot read and that was quick. Next stop.
OH PICKLES! One I am so dreading.
I input the address in my GPS and start the 30 minute drive. I realize I will be an hour early. But I have nothing left on
my list to do. As I exit the highway, I spot a car wash. Umm...good way to kill some time. I have so many dead bugs on
my car from my driving over 5000 miles in a month. I order up an exterior clean because the interior is just a mess with sweat shirts, movies, clothes, shoes, food, etc.
I wait 10 minutes then hop in my sparkling clean car and notice all the chips in the windshield. OH Pickles again!
About a mile down the road, I stop into a service station. I see that there is a full service island and opt to pay the additional $1.00 a gallon to get my oil, tires, and fluids checked. I was going to take it into Lexus but that would of cost over $100.00 plus they wanted to do a HUGE CHECK UP on the car...so I cancelled my appointment. $50.00 later, fueled up, tires filled and fluid topped off, I continue on this dreadful journey to my last location.
The lady from GPS guided me directly to the spot. I pulled into the parking lot at the hospital and locked the car doors and started walking towards the entrance. The part of the hospital I was entering was also the cancer wing. I caught an elevator with a lady that had a scarf wrapped around her head where her hair should be. She appeared to be my age. As we entered the elevator, I noticed a gentleman in his 40s or 50s with a cooler of something medical attached to him and I could smell the medicine coming out of his cooler. The lady and man exchanged some words which included some jokes about cocktails of choice to chill in his cooler. I was the outsider because I had no idea what they were discussing. But they were smiling and friendly and laughing and living with Cancer. I was PETRIFIED with my upcoming appointment and felt like a fool. What is wrong with me. As far as I know I am perfectly healthy. I have seen Death way to close. I have experienced the worst. OK. Not very gracefully, but I have. And I just could not handle what I was walking into.
Rose Breast Center was the door I walked into. I gave my name and was sent to a lady to check me in. Within 1 minute of sitting down in the chair, I lost it! LOST IT! She looked at me and said lets go outside. I make it to the hallway when my face is getting numb and I cannot breathe. Tears falling down my face and I grabbed on to the wall and slide down. All in my skirt with a slit up to there and gucci wedges. At least I looked cute in distress.
I heard one lady say, "do you need a glass of water?" and then another lady walking by and stopping to see what was going on. The next thing I remember is one lady is back with juice and water and another with a chair for me to sit in and another lady is wiping me down with wet towels. I finally catch my breathe and start breathing. What is up with all of this hyperventilating? NEVER BEFORE HAS IT BEEN THIS BAD. When my nephew passed away, it was bad. But not to the point where I almost passed out. I gain a smidget of my composure and return inside to continue checking in. Working myself all up again but not as bad.
I was sent to the waiting area to wait for my first Mammogram.
I had just started reading how Marisa Tomei looks so good in the recent Shape magazine when I get called back. I was so awkward walking back. I could not get my act together and did not want to go.
I was put in the changing room and told to put on the robe and then head over to exam room #1.
Shaking in my wedges, I walk across the hall to meet the mammogram lady.
Thinking I should take off these wedges right about now because I was sure I was going to fall...She said not to in case there were staples on the floor. That was not a concern of mine at all at this point. But OK I will listen to her.
Step up to the machine, she plops my right Double D in there and moves the machine around. Steps back, tells me to take a deep breath. I inhale hold for a few seconds then was told to exhale and then was told first slide done. Are you kidding me? At that point, I started laughing and asked, "is that it?" Yes...that was it.
What in the world was I thinking? Why did I get so upset and worked up for the unknown. It was just fine. Not uncomfortable. Just a little awkward with a lady touching your boob. But it was just about the same as getting sized for a bra. NOTHING! AT this point, I am embarrassed. Whoever said mammograms were bad? That is a joke. I can handle one of these any day over a shot or blood drawn. It was so nothing! Like going to get fitted for a bra. Nothing! 3 more slides and I am blushing for acting like a fool.
After I got dressed, I walked through the waiting room and stopped by to tell the sweet lady that was wiping me down with towels during unnecessary panic attack that it was not bad at all. She offered to cut off my hospital band and I let her. There was a secret desire deep inside for me to wear it. I wanted a souvenir of my day. But off it went and into the trash. We had a bit of a laugh and I jumped in the car and headed back to Vail.
Ride home I stopped in Dillon for a 12 pack. I think I deserve a drink right about now and not sure if I want to go to red lion after meeting lacrosse boy. Did I mention, I was drunk that night?
Home, scrapbook, beer, and bed.
Today was up at 3:30AM! WTH? laid around until about 6 when I got up to go to the village to get a paper. Me in my jammies and clogs with a coat over me. Was so nice and peaceful this morning. No-one out but the beer delivery guy. Not even the Vail Daily was out yet. I grabbed another paper and walked back to the condo. I laid in bed and researched home remedies for hyperventilating and then read the paper while listening to I LOVE LUCY on the TV. I finally fell back to sleep until 10AM.
When I woke, I checked e-mail and saw that all of my doctor reports have been received by Medical except my mammogram and Pap cytology.
So off I went to send the request to my ATL ob-gyn to forward pap results to Medical. (those don't go real well either, but that is such a thing of the past...so May)
I stopped by City Market, then off to lunch. Feeling a bit hung-over today. Maybe had 1 or 2 too many? maybe?
I can't believe it, looks like I am going to Antarctica. If they don't stop me with all of my panic attacks I have been having at the Docs.
After lunch, I wandered through Vail and found a perfect spot in the grass for me to lie. I listened to the water flow by. Watched the children play in the creek. Watched the new parents in awe over their little ones and was just in the "NOW". I picked up my book and read. Looking up when I heard laughter. It did not matter that I was alone and all by myself. I was there, there until the clouds took over the sky.
Nap time! Wake up! Then Walk! My thoughts were getting to me during my walk. I tried to run but realized I could not run from the past and into the dreams of the future. I am reliving the past and thinking about the future. I know I can't run from something and then directly into something that I desire but being caught between the past and the future is no way to live. For a moment, I lose myself in my i-pod. sing and dance and as my arms flail out, I almost knock a lady down trying to bike past me. A smile comes across my face. Not that I almost knocked the lady down, but I was in the moment.
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Thoughts in my head and living the dream!
I am so torn at the moment. I have a wonderful, unique and rare opportunity to go to Antarctica.
How many people get to go there? In the process of this becoming a reality, I met a guy 3 weeks ago.
We talked for a bit and had fun with his group of friends.
And this someone asked me for my number and I was flat out RUDE to him.
I finally gave it to him and surprise, surprise...he did not call.
Why was I so mean? Bad timing? I am homeless, jobless and in the middle of the country with no idea where I am going. It is just not a good time. Or am I in fear of getting hurt. With my last 2 boyfriends I was contacted by the police wanting information about them. One was being shady and roaming the streets and the other, I am not so sure but a 4AM bang on the door by Dekalb county police is probably not a good thing.
One ended up stalking me and the other I found out is gay or bisexual and/ or a cross dresser. Not sure which category he falls in.
So in my head, I feel like I screwed up new guy. But did I really? what do I know about this guy? He plays lacrosse, his buddy told me he was very wealthy and he is from Pennsylvania or New Jersey. If that is all I know, why am I so upset he did not call?
I know why he did not call. I was mean and rude. I am mad at myself but I had my reasons. At that time they seemed valid and still do. so why am I upset???? To ease this confusion in my head I continue to tell myself ..."At that moment, that is who I was." No going back. No looking back. No regrets. Move forward and learn from it. move forward and work on things about myself that I want to change. Do I really want to meet a guy when I am so wasted that I barely remember the whole convo?
I don't think so...so in the meantime...I will spend my time on activities that I like, stay out of the bars, play outside and work on my nz scrapbook. Tomorrow, I head to denver for more doctor tests and drop off paper work. I am due to leave aug 9. So soon, so exciting, so fun! Life is good!
How many people get to go there? In the process of this becoming a reality, I met a guy 3 weeks ago.
We talked for a bit and had fun with his group of friends.
And this someone asked me for my number and I was flat out RUDE to him.
I finally gave it to him and surprise, surprise...he did not call.
Why was I so mean? Bad timing? I am homeless, jobless and in the middle of the country with no idea where I am going. It is just not a good time. Or am I in fear of getting hurt. With my last 2 boyfriends I was contacted by the police wanting information about them. One was being shady and roaming the streets and the other, I am not so sure but a 4AM bang on the door by Dekalb county police is probably not a good thing.
One ended up stalking me and the other I found out is gay or bisexual and/ or a cross dresser. Not sure which category he falls in.
So in my head, I feel like I screwed up new guy. But did I really? what do I know about this guy? He plays lacrosse, his buddy told me he was very wealthy and he is from Pennsylvania or New Jersey. If that is all I know, why am I so upset he did not call?
I know why he did not call. I was mean and rude. I am mad at myself but I had my reasons. At that time they seemed valid and still do. so why am I upset???? To ease this confusion in my head I continue to tell myself ..."At that moment, that is who I was." No going back. No looking back. No regrets. Move forward and learn from it. move forward and work on things about myself that I want to change. Do I really want to meet a guy when I am so wasted that I barely remember the whole convo?
I don't think so...so in the meantime...I will spend my time on activities that I like, stay out of the bars, play outside and work on my nz scrapbook. Tomorrow, I head to denver for more doctor tests and drop off paper work. I am due to leave aug 9. So soon, so exciting, so fun! Life is good!
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Poked, Prodded, Hyperventilated, Ouch, Tired!
Exhausted!
But I got to cross off Wyoming and Montana off my list!
Montana was absolutely gorgeous! And Wyoming was quite nice as well.
A smile came across my face each time I crossed a new state line.
Now I have 17 more to go!
So so tired. Spent the night in Denver last night. And visited the dentist, doctor, and lab for way too much!
I arrived to Vail about 2 hours ago and I am about to take a pain pill and go to bed. My arm from my shots hurt :(!
But I got to cross off Wyoming and Montana off my list!
Montana was absolutely gorgeous! And Wyoming was quite nice as well.
A smile came across my face each time I crossed a new state line.
Now I have 17 more to go!
So so tired. Spent the night in Denver last night. And visited the dentist, doctor, and lab for way too much!
I arrived to Vail about 2 hours ago and I am about to take a pain pill and go to bed. My arm from my shots hurt :(!
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Got a job!
Woohoo...so I am still in Kirkland, WA. Mariah's place is a little over a mile from lake washington. As soon as you get on the main drag, you start to see water approaching and just look at it in awe. I find peace and tranquility whenever I see it. Did the drive twice today...and now about to take a walk. Great, fun, friendly city!
So I got a call to go work in Antarctica. Yes, I know I was on way way to sunny southern cali. but nothing is set in stone.
The job: lead dining attendant. I feel like I am trying to glorify it because it is basically a waittress in the cafeteria including washing dishes and mopping. Have I ever done any of this? NO!...The schedules, ordering of supplies and setting up desserts...I am cool with!
So why would I want to go to antarctica to do this?
Why not?
Pros: Get to go to antarctica
have no living expenses - because live in a dorm and eat in the cafeteria
free haircuts - don't think there is a colorist there.
save money - because not much to spend it on in antarctica
once in a lifetime opportunity
Cons: stuck on ice
work 60 hours a week doing work I have never done (I think this will teach me good work ethics)
sleep in a dorm ...UGH
all alcohol is rationed... I need to learn self control
as well as coke.... Been trying to get off of it...
public drunkeness is not accepted...probably best for me...
So going to get back in my car and head back east. Time to board a plane soon...next stop Antarctica!
Sunday, July 11, 2010
Am I really this dumb?
OK so last night I was out with my friend Mariah. We went and met up with some friends of her at work and had drinks. One of the guys is deaf. We were having cocktails and chatting when he asked me if I knew sign language. I said no...but look and started digging through my wallet. In my wallet I found a token that has dream written in Braille. I took it out and showed him. Instantly I felt like the biggest idiot. He looked at me and said, " I am deaf not blind" then looked at my friend and said...." I am deaf and she is dumb"
OH MY GOODNESS! Cannot believe I did that.
Thursday, July 8, 2010
wings & roots
You have one or the other
The bartender last friday night shared that with me.
Which one do you think I have?
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Kirkland Washington
Wow! Great times with an old friend. Been 5 years since I have seen Mariah but it just seems like yesterday. Not sure where I am going next or what I am thinking I want. I got a contract from NANA services to be an alternate, so could be deployed to antarctica at any moment. Which could be fun! woo hoo! and cold...brrrrrr....But once again, I am just an alternate so probably won't go.
Either way, I am very proud of myself for getting this far! This job is very hard to get and I got a contract!
So for now I am lounging in Kirkland waiting for 2PM to come so I can go on a walk down to farmers market!
And will sit in this lounge and endure the heat for the moment!
Thursday, July 1, 2010
up & at 'em
Still not feeling well at all. Woke up to a Vail headache. But time to rally and move on.
Off to Seattle today!
12AM - checked into hotel in boise. Maybe i can get some sleep tonight. And hopefully my appetite will come back.
expenses
$38.00 gas
$49.00 gas
$ 1.07 sprite
$6.39 dinner
$149.00 hotel
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
I hate this feeling!
OK so ended up at the bar last night. Do not remember much and really feels uncomfortable. And today hating life. Depressed, sad, tired, and sick.
I went to try and get lunch but could not eat. Walked through the village and saw the young kids in the fountain. I want to be in the fountain. Barefoot and fancy free!
expenses
lunch 14.00
treats 43.00
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Sleep
I wish I could go to sleep. I heard noises all night long and jumped several times. I am in a pretty secure location, but that is no guarantee. I was traumatic situation happened ealier this year and now I have a difficulty going to sleep at night. Each bang, creak, or even the air turning on, I immediately bolt up with my heart pounding.
After one noise, I opened the door to look out in the hallway. I noticed the frame on the door was pulling apart. This framing has previously been broken. It probably just came apart due to me walking in and out of the door. But I still wondered and worried and tossed and turned.
I am so tired. I managed to finally make it to the grocery store before heading to the village for Vendettas. 2 slices of the snow pig and a salad. I am so full right now!
Expenses
Grocery 47.00
Grocery 8.00
lunch 17.00
dinner$14.00
Bar ????
HUNGOVER
I hate being hungover. I think that is why when I woke up I took some codeine pills and attempted to go back to sleep. No success.
I finally pulled myself out of bed to venture down to Bully Ranch. I got in the elevator pushed the button to floor 1 and the elevator got stuck for at least 3 minutes. I do not like small spaces. I was on the emergency phone listening to the automated operator directing me to the right dept. All I could think was...great in less than 12 hours the police are going to have to help me. fortunately during that time on the phone, the open door button decided to work and I ran out of there....So off to Bully Ranch...I was craving their chicken fingers...Mistake. They were not as good as I remember. I ate a couple of them and then went back to the condo to take a sleeping pain pill. Off for a bit of a snooze while watching the kardashians marrathon on the tv.
At 5:30, I decided I should go grab dinner. But nothing taste good. I hate being this hungover. So off to Ore House because they had a 20% off early bird special. That was the first and last time there. I started off with a Caesar Salad, then filet mignon and shrimp, The shrimp were $12.00. There was only 4. I have a hard time believing a shrimp cost 3$. The mashed potatoes were cold and the veggies were a bit cold as well. I never ever send back food. But I had to send the potatoes back. I heard the cook argue with the waiter about the temp of my potatoes so he probably spit in them after I sent them back. I ordered chocolate mousse cake for dessert. Not that i needed it...but I wanted it. I rushed through the dessert and made it back home for the Bachelorette. For some reason, I am not a fan of alli. I don't like how she tells frank she wants the old frank back. She barely knows this guy. While watching the bachelorette, Walker (one of the lacrosse guys from Virginia) gave me a call to meet up. I just can't go out tonight. Kind of bummed because these guys were so nice and fun and they are leaving tomorrow. But think it is in my best interest to lay low tonight..so goodnight!
Things accomplished while hungover today:
updated blog
sent out 3 resumes
Expenses:
lunch $11.00
dinner $ 57.00
Farmers Market, Mexican, Pizza, Beer & Vail Lacrosse Shootout!
Woke up and decided it was too early to get up! Back to bed until 11AM.
I started the day at the Farmer's Market. Was so excited to go to it. Thought I would pick up some fruit, veggies, snacks for the stay. But it was primarily restaurants. I wandered and wandered and wandered. Before deciding to pick up an egg with chorizo, tortilla and salsa...and it was delish! I took my breakfast to a bench and love how friendly people are here. I spoke with a lady who swears she has met me before. She thinks it might of been at Charm School.
I went along with it knowing that I have not been to Charm School in probably 7 years and at that time I was at least 50 pounds lighter. We discussed my day's plan and how long she had been in Vail. The weather and the tourist. I then decided it was time for a shower the village was packed with people that somehow are dressed to a t even in their sunday lounge wear and workout clothes.
After I freshened up a bit, I ventured back down to the village for lunch. Still so many people in the village. Found more booths in the farmers market. Was going to have lunch there, but then decided that I did not want to sit outside because it is kind of hot here! I ended up at a Mexican Restaurant at the Transportation Center. World Cup was on and several construction workers were in there on their lunch break watching the game. Then back to the hotel. What in the world am I going to do here for a few days...only so much eating one can do.
Out of boredom, I decided to take a walk in the Village and then over to Lionshead. So peaceful walking the half mile to lionshead. Kids playing in the creek, families bike riding, boys playing disk frisbee and nice walkway. Once I got there..I decided to get a gelato. And have a wander. for a bit. Then back to the condo. Gosh this is getting old.
Pazzo's Pizza...
a slice of cheese, a bud light and a bar. The slice was yummy but very small. So I ordered another slice and beer. I was in the mood to listen to music so I headed to the Red Lion.
Red Lion...
I got carded! Love it! was only going to have a few drinks...but we all know how that goes. So cliff notes of the night. Bar was getting crowded. Vail Lacrosse shootout was going on and loads of guys drinking lots of beer. Guys start chattin me up and people start dancing. I was asked to dance with some guys so off to the dance floor. Most of these guys were married and I had to tell some of them the way they were behaving was unacceptable and to step away from me. I had one guy attempt to pull up my shirt to kiss my tummy? UM..that was weird. Luckily, I grabbed my shirt before he could raise it for the bar to see my muffin top! And I danced and danced and laugh and sang....and just had fun. Fortunately the bar closed at 11pm because I think I had enough and it was time to go to bed. On my way out, I met Tim from Boston. We were talking and he was trying to get me to go back to his place. Several problems with this whole scenario...he is married, he wanted me to go smoke pot with him and I know much better than to go hang out with a married, pot smoking stranger.
We got to talking to some locals on our way out when married pot smoking tim from boston took a tumble down the 2 steps. I feel horrible because he grabbed for me and I stepped back. That was when he landed on his face. The guys called over the police man that was walking by. He called the ambulance and the local boys took off. Fire Truck shows up first, they take a look at him, then the ambulance pulls up. they decide to take him to the hospital. I think he bit through his lip and lost a few teeth??? Not sure blood all over the place. I asked the officer if I could leave and took off. On my walk home I saw a fox - freaked out and went back to the scene of the crime. The officer offered me a ride home....So I jumped in the patrol truck and was driven home! I managed to pass out right when my head hit the pillow.
Expenses:
Breakfast $4.00
Lunch $10.00
Store $11.00
Dinner $14.00
Bar $36.00
Ice Cream $6.00
Monday, June 28, 2010
Get me to Vail already!
OK...so woke up a bit hungover. URGH! Gathered my bags, iced my cooler and packed up the car. At checkout, I asked the front desk of a good local place for lunch and inquired about the man from the bar. They apologized and we had quite a laugh. I was informed that the man...does not always tell the truth. Which I pretty much already knew. The girls at the desk mentioned he is difficult to deal with. Makes them call him MR. xxxxx and requested surround sound when he checked in, and when the flat screen tv did not work he took it apart and requested a second room for watching tv b/c he did not want to move rooms. We had a laugh and I started my day. at about 11. first stop Brint's diner.
Brint's Diner
It was on Diners, Drive ins and dives on the food network channel. It was on the show for diner...but think it was more of a dive. I drove to a back alley and there it was right in front of what looked like low income housing. I went in and it was kind of quiet in there. But it did begin filling up at about noon. I ordered the Chicken fried steak, with fries, peas, salad and a roll.
At noon...back to the car and continued down the road. Accd. to GPS I should get to Vail at about 9PM. OH my can we say hot day! Drove through Kansas and thought it was nice and peaceful to see nothing. But it was HOT. Car registered at 104 degrees. Funny thing is an hour later once I made it to Colorado the temperature dropped down to 84. The view became gorgeous. I was watching the sun set and then it would storm. I saw rainbows and and enjoyed the ride until I got into Denver. The highway was so difficult to see. There was a bad glare and I did not like the drive. I had a hard time seeing. Drove through tunnels and around mountains. I stopped off in a little town about an hour from Vail. I so loved it. It was the neatest little place I have seen in a long time. I grabbed a Carl's Junior...And jumped back in the car.
Vail
Finally made it here. 9:34. Could not park the car in the garage. Was very difficult so was going to go find a parking garage. I called my dad and he told me there was another garage in the complex, so off I went to the other garage, parked my car, and straight to bed.
expenses:
lunch $12
gas $40
Gas $40
dinner $ 8.00
Bill Clinton, Your Mama's good food, a drive, and a strange man at hotel bar!
Whoa...can we say sleep in... Well maybe if I actually was able to. The bed was awesome, the black out curtains were great, the landscaping company starting at 8AM...URGH! But I was so tired. Emotionally and Physically Exhausted. I started wondering what in the world am I doing? Where am I going? Lost, confused and frustrated.
I managed to get out of there by 11AM. First stop, the William Clinton Library. And I have to say even though I am a staunch Republican, they did a great job. Was very entertaining. I only spent about an hour there. They had some neat stuff in there. I got to see correspondences from celebrities and President Clinton. There was a display on Events at the White House and Christmas at the White House. And a short 15 minute film of Bill Clinton Talking. That was not so good. His reading was so stiff and kind of uncomfortable to watch. But overall, I am really glad I went. I asked the volunteers there where I should go to lunch and they recommended Your Mama's Good Food.
Your Mama's Good Food....MMM MMM Good! I could not pick a meat...so I picked 2.
Chicken Spaghetti and Meatloaf. Side of Cream Corn and Carrots and a nice big huge Roll!
With a real fat coke! It was delish and also very well worth the visit! Some of the friendliest people I have encountered on my journey. Wish I would of arrived a bit earlier though because they were closing and I bet they were sold out on some of the items at that time. But was a nice visit. I wrapped up the roll and took it for later. On my way out, the owner looked at me and said, you must of been hungry. Um..ok...yes, I was hungry and yes that was darn good. I don't think they know my mama...because her cooking is not that good...Well she does make a good fried egg, good salads and nice sandwiches.
At about 2PM, i jumped in the car and turned the GPS on to guide me to Vail. I was not feeling the drive today. Not at all. Stopping probably every hour and a half. I drove out of Arkansas and into Oklahoma. Exhausted I stopped at the Oklahoma Visitor center right at 4:55PM. Good thing because they close at 5. I inquired about distances and hotels. Very friendly staff there.
Back to the car for a goal to get to Wichita. 5 hours away. Drive, stop, drive, stop, drive, Marriott.
I arrived at Wichita Marriott at 10:00PM. Parking lot was far from entrance and no bell man. But they were so nice and let me leave my car in the round about drive at the front door. I grabbed one bag out of my car asked how late the bar was opened dropped my luggage in the room and off to the bar. Just wanted to relax and sit and have a drink or two. I started talking to the bartender and she was so nice. Asking me where I was coming from and where I was going to. Word got out to the other 3 patrons of the bar that I was from Atlanta. One man came over and introduced himself. He was from Kennesaw. I really didn't care. Then as I was getting up to go to the room - a guy from Southern Cali - brought me a beer. So I went to talk to him.
He was DRUNK. And loved talking about himself. He told me...he grew up in an orphanage, his mother is ann sheridan and his dad could either be cary grant, elvis or john kennedy, he is the next donald trump...but with better hair, he owns a company, he has 3 houses, he is a platinum marriott reward holder, and after he found out his mother was ann sheridan while on her deathbed...he had a nervous breakdown and joined the marines. Um...yea..And that was only a half hour convo. we got pushed out of the bar and sent to the lobby b/c the bar was closing. I took my first opportunity to thank this gentleman for the drink and excuse myself. A little drunk after 4 beers, I went to sleep.
Expenses:
WC library $7.00
lunch $11.00
gas $40.00
Hotel $104.00
Water $2.22
bar $12.50
Old Friends and New Adventures
First stop on my trip to finding a new home, Homewood Al. for a visit with Courtney! I had not seen her in 16 months, so it was so nice to visit! I arrived at Courtney's house at 11ish and loved the visit with her. Unfortunately, I only got to see one of her children. Winn - what a cutey! We went to a nice lunch and I think I talked her ear off. Then I got a tour of the children's summer camps, schools, and neighborhood. We don't get to see each other that often, but we always catch right up and have a great time! After about 2 hours with Ms. Court and Winn, it was time for me to jump in the car and go. I typed in Vail, Co to the GPS and started driving. First through Alabama, then through Mississippi, next Tennessee and lastly stop in Little Rock Arkansas. I thought about going to Tunica MS because I have some free nights at the MGM there...but I would of spent double on that gambling..so I continued on. Trafic was light. Music was readily available on the radio. After I left the Atlanta area, Hip Hop and Rap stations pretty much disappeared. I was left with Christian Rock, Country, and Michael Jackson. (anniversary of his death and everyone can't get enough of MJ.
Arriving in Little Rock, I typed in Marriot on my GPS and went to the first one - sold out. Found a courtyard about 30 minutes out on the other side of town. Got there at about 9:30PM (10:30 atl time). Sorted my luggage in my car and off to find supper. Only to find most places were closed. At 11PM - I ventured down to the 24 hour Market in the hotel and picked up a $5.00 WW pizza (normally 3$ at a store) popped it in the lobby microwave and crawled in bed to eat dinner. Fast to sleep!
How much am I spending:
Gas $31.00
Gas $40.00
Hotel $ 140.00
Pizza $5.00
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
GPS
Last July, I went to New Zealand. Last July, I planned to keep a blog. Trip is over..and as you can see...did not write a thing. Loved it stayed in Napier most of the time and travelled through North Island and South Island. Arrived back to the states at the end of February. I have been in Atlanta since then. I have taken several trips. One disastorous trip to Vail, a fun train trip to New Orleans (until I ended up with food poisoning), and a fabulous tour of Cali from San Diego to Napa Valley to San Francisco then down to LA to visit one of my closest friends and her new baby. I have been up to Lake Rabun once and went to Macon to pick strawberries. Needless to say, I have been keeping busy with lots of mini vacays..And I have been getting bored with times spent trying to figure out what is next!
When I arrived back in Atlanta, I spent a lot of time with my neice and nephews. I looked through their school work on the bulleton board and spent loads of time talking to my Caroline. A lot of the kids had to fill out...how old is mommy, what does mommy do, what is mommy's favorite food...etc.. and I got a good laugh out of that. I wanted to see what a 5 year old thought about me, so I asked her the questions so I could see how she perceives me. I can't remember the answers to any of them but one. And that was when I decided I need to get out of here. When I asked her "what do I do" -she answered - sit in your room. OH GOODNESS...I am 35 years old, living in my old bedroom at my parent's house and unemployed...Not a way I want to be thought of.
So needless to say....I am leaving tomorrow. I could not decide between bus, (ok..ok...ok...but for $550 (or something like that) you can get a pass for 60 days of travel. Not too bad) plane or car. I opted to jump in the car and decide along the way where my journey will take me. 1st stop Birmingham to visit an old dear friend for a few hours then hop back in the car and continue on to Vail. Not sure if I am going through TX or travel North through MO. Both options are fun...could stop in and visit a friend in MO or stop by Cadillac Ranch and see if I can find my signature on the cadillac I signed in '99 and then visited again '00. It is probably gone by now. My mom wants me to take a GPS so I don't get lost. She just went to the store to buy me one. But I don't even know where I am going...so what good is a GPS at this moment? Oh well, first stop is b'ham. Then maybe I will figure out the next one.
Hopefully, I will be better updating this blog on this trip. Because did not even get started on last one...Off for a good night sleep before I start on this journey to I don't know where....
When I arrived back in Atlanta, I spent a lot of time with my neice and nephews. I looked through their school work on the bulleton board and spent loads of time talking to my Caroline. A lot of the kids had to fill out...how old is mommy, what does mommy do, what is mommy's favorite food...etc.. and I got a good laugh out of that. I wanted to see what a 5 year old thought about me, so I asked her the questions so I could see how she perceives me. I can't remember the answers to any of them but one. And that was when I decided I need to get out of here. When I asked her "what do I do" -she answered - sit in your room. OH GOODNESS...I am 35 years old, living in my old bedroom at my parent's house and unemployed...Not a way I want to be thought of.
So needless to say....I am leaving tomorrow. I could not decide between bus, (ok..ok...ok...but for $550 (or something like that) you can get a pass for 60 days of travel. Not too bad) plane or car. I opted to jump in the car and decide along the way where my journey will take me. 1st stop Birmingham to visit an old dear friend for a few hours then hop back in the car and continue on to Vail. Not sure if I am going through TX or travel North through MO. Both options are fun...could stop in and visit a friend in MO or stop by Cadillac Ranch and see if I can find my signature on the cadillac I signed in '99 and then visited again '00. It is probably gone by now. My mom wants me to take a GPS so I don't get lost. She just went to the store to buy me one. But I don't even know where I am going...so what good is a GPS at this moment? Oh well, first stop is b'ham. Then maybe I will figure out the next one.
Hopefully, I will be better updating this blog on this trip. Because did not even get started on last one...Off for a good night sleep before I start on this journey to I don't know where....
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
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